It’s early in the morning in my room
& all i can think of is saying i miss you
i want to awaken you
just to say it; i’m in that kind of mood


At my phone tempted to text before the morning dew
hits your window pane
or the first thought of the day has reached your brain


That lust or love
or could we add other things to what i said above
I shouldn’t apologize about loving you this much
when that’s the truth of this, that & such
an incredible touch


Is as big as the state of Texas; yet fits in your clutch
i just strive to be in the middle of your days hunger like lunch
fulfill your hunger without asking for a bunch
i’m selfless towards you & with that i’ve said too much



I want to sit
Next to you & talk about life
The etiquette of love that keeps me blind
& the euphoria of how we should spend our time


This moment I’d like to say is a combination of love & lust
Sprinkled with all my desires of the truth
Of how in a panoramic state of mind all I see is you


Words are keen
Yet for whatever reason I cannot seem
To speak
Or paint the picture the way it’s meant to be seen


That’s deep
Loss of weight & sleep
My thoughts; so fragile I’ve become timid
Don’t know why cause if I get it out I’m winning


Seen plenty of girls, but in you I’ve seen a woman
Like my mom; which brings me home
Before it gets dark with no other reason to roam
Cause you’re my better half cloned



She began to be hurt as a teenager
Gravitating towards the same guys that will hurt her           
The escape was art & career  


Reflection told her it won’t be enough
So she sought selfishness to see if she could overcome
Knowing that she’s not ready to open up to love


Focusing on herself can become
Extremely tough         
So what if I choose him to be a friend with benefits     
No stress; yet


Know it wont be right
To take him up these stairs of flight
When all I’d be willing to give is couple hours at night
Here comes the fright

I completely let him go
How would that make me feel knowing he’s always there when im low
No matter the case he will never judge


Need that like a wireless phone needs to be plugged      
The connection is wireless but electricity makes it truly run
Life should be easier & fun


As for me
I try to understand how she wants this done.
I do for you emotionally so you wont come undone    
So you excell in areas where you seem to have control


Education & artistic pursuits
Longing to help others yet forget about you
& I’m here as your number 1 fan
To show unconditional like a real man


Your heart & psyche are still fragile
So even with all this control all the  while
You dont feel fulfilled even though you’ve taken some me time


New position
Silence till you become mine
Or till the next time
We spend time




I want to give you
what i want from you
love,mischief & everything
in between


I feel alone
all it takes is one look on my phone
the anticipation turns me on
more than my mind stays erected


Glance at you & i was infected
by love hoping never to be neglected
one link in the form of you to stay connected


A memo you keep me on message
everything i feel is recorded
in my emotional hard drive
& since you’re priceless; i can never say i own it


If your boat ever sinks, i’ll sift through the wreckage
realizing no matter the pain you’ll be my bandage
& if you aren’t then gravity will show me the landing



I can hear her ask me this question
would you still love me without question
If I wasn’t who you thought in all dimensions


In order for me to maintain
I had to turn away
& I reply
oh my


Love is eternal & you’ll always seduce my mind
some say the sky’s the limit
but my vision of you makes it infinite


I’ve always told you i’m willing to play any position
not in the military, but you are my only mission
so if i quit i’ll never succeed
in loving you in all variations you thought you wouldn’t need


Can i open up the door to show you what you mean to me
when what i feel Hollywood couldn’t even screen cinematically
sometimes i feel you’re too real for what i feel
so i inhale; then exhale thoughts of you as i stand still


Call to others cause i say i will
medicate you with love minus the liquid or pill
all while weaving these thoughts into you like twill
some say what i’d do, but i do what i say; which makes it for real

artist: Natalia Baykalova "Girl covered by curtain"
artist: Natalia Baykalova “Girl covered by curtain”


I hear the sound of deception
my own thoughts have failed me i must mention
i’ve never given all of my emotions
except for the one i’ll call devotion


Has a tattoo to attest
of where she’s been in hopes to never digress
while i show what i hold
towards her emotionally in my body & soul


I guess its time to put my pen down & write no more
in hope one day you’ll truly understand what i stood for
so re-read


Breath of sincerity that’s already been spoken
immortalized into a romantic disposition
all about your happiness with no conditions
regression isn’t always the best lesson


You tell your mind to differ to all sounds of deception
where you can build your own perceptions
into what you’d like to call perfection
no matter the ramifications


Me not loving you wouldn’t leave any good results
kind of like veins to your arteries minus a pulse
even with blood circulating you cant seem to cope
no prescription needed, cause in you i’ve found my dope


Sound of deception tied around my neck like a rope
with the purity of my feelings induced with hope
where i religiously enshrine love for you into messages like the pope
is it the sound of deception
or the true form of loves manifestation?
art of deception